Kalamazoo Killings

Should I be scared?

Only 48 hours ago, a man shot dead 6 people in the area of Kalamazoo. The shootings were random and appear to follow no reason or logic whatsoever. The suspect has been described as “normal”, a married man, with a job (he was a Huber driver), hobbies and with no criminal record.

So, out of the blue, after dropping off some customers, he shot a woman in downtown Kalamazoo, a father and a son standing by a car dealership a mile away and later on in the same evening, shot another three victims in a car park of a well-known restaurant nearby.

The number of messages from our friends and family back in Europe was overwhelming and it took most of our Sunday to reassure everyone we are okay and to reassure ourselves that these freak accidents could happen anywhere, right? We must count our blessings and thank our lucky stars for we are alive and well.

As the shock subsides and everyone has gone back to work and to school, I began to feel uneasy. The headlines are clear: we should not concentrate on the fear or hatred but on our compassion for the victims and the love for each other. That is a powerful and positive attitude but how exactly am I supposed to just go on? I keep thinking, the shootings took place less than a mile away from the college where I attend classes, twice a week. I have been to that restaurant, with my daughter, several times. I could have been one of the victims. We could have decided to go out Saturday evening and be, like these poor people, in the wrong place, at the wrong time! Stop! Breathe! Don’t let the panic sit in!

It is just me who feels afraid when I go out today? There is an eerie feeling in the air, as I walk on the corridors in KVCC today, I am sure of it, and yet, everyone appears normal, calm and collected.

I feel I should scream, share my confusion and go around asking people: “Excuse me, should I be afraid?”

This must be how millions of Parisians felt following the massive shootings of innocent people last January and this is why there were massive appeals to the population to come out to the street cafes and restaurants and show the world that love, joy and peace will prevail, not violence, not death.

I wonder if that is what will happen in Kalamazoo. From what I have seen so far, this is a community that believes in the power within and supports one another. So, I am hoping we will soon have a demonstration of our collective mourning, openly share our fears and move on to the future, whatever that may be.

Right now, any future sounds more promising and upbeat than the present.